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Then I went for his trousers and unfastened them.
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I don’t know what got into me because we began cuddling immediately. He told me he couldn’t hold it back any longer and wanted to act on his feelings. We used to wake up about 6.00am so I got worried. Then one fine morning, about 4.00 am Brian, woke me up. Then we openly talked about our feelings. We studied together and the good old days were seemingly back. We even started washing each other’s clothes and spent most of the time together. Surprisingly Brian was more than ready to accept me back. Just before KCSE, I started forcing myself to Brian.I really wouldn’t want the school life to end without having another last chance to enjoy true friendship. This time I was becoming more competent and even beat Brian on several tests. So I continued trying to continue reading without any help. To my surprise, he reacted coldly but I made him promise not to tell anyone about it. Finally, I decided to take the last measure to save our friendship. I was hurt and my grades continued dropping. He was more focused and didn’t seem to care anymore. I really tried to get our friendship back to where it was but clearly, Brian had moved on. Our grades were dropping, I even almost got a supplementary back in the first term. Our friendship was hurt but we continued being deskmates and bedmates. Our friendship was strongest and even our grades were nearing perfection but as always date always has something in store. By this time we had forgotten about other side guys we had. Every time we achieved we would celebrate by having a special treat at the canteen. Now that we were in form four we had to study even harder. When school reopened we became deskmates once again. I began missing him and I couldn’t wait for the next year to come so that we could be back together. I didn’t, in fact, I only got more hooked to him. We went for the December holidays and I promised myself to get over him soonest. That’s when I realized that my feelings for him were mutual. He was trying his best to try and make me feel the same. So during the two days, I talked to him a lot. Then there was another guy who was also a good friend. We had a little scuffle and we didn’t get along very well for about two days. I kept trying to convince myself that I wasn’t going gay. Just like all shy people I relied on physical communication to show my affection towards him. What made it worse is that I’m extremely shy. I feared that I would lose him if I told him about my feelings. He’d come to my hometown and we’d have a lot of snacks and visit shopping malls to do a little window shopping during closing days. He was always there for me, gave me cash whenever I needed it. I tried my best to ignore them but I simply couldn’t. He was so nice to me that I began developing feelings towards him. He used to buy me a lot of stuff at the canteen and even introduced me to his father during one of the visiting days. He was very helpful especially after learning about my background. I told him everything about myself and he did the same. Brian and I continued getting closer to the point where we became confidantes. It became a routine and we continued with life at Bradford. Sometimes we would be alone in class fantasizing about the girls. It had a lot of girls which we would fantasize about. In particular, there was a pulse which we loved.
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Brian had plenty of them and could easily afford to have them leaked in school by the cooks and watchmen. We’d stay in class and revise together till late at night.
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I improved greatly and within no time, I was a top performer too. Better still I became his bedmate.īrian really helped me in my school work. ( In Bradford they have cubicles which carry six students per cubicle). We shared the house we slept in and soon enough I moved to his cubicle. We got off very smoothly and with no time we were best friends. Then he had this kind of girl like behaviour. Brian*( name changed to protect identity).īrian was a better performer than I was and came from a far much better background financially. I just had to sit alone Infront of the class. Back in form three, no one wanted to be my deskmate. To make it worse, I didn’t perform very well so I didn’t have many friends. A fact which mainly owes to my background. I was a looser and I liked keeping to myself ( I’m an introvert ). So Back in Bradford, I struggled a lot with school life. I went to Bradford* High school (name withheld). However, my story is not set there but back in Highschool. I literally struggle a lot to remain in School. I’ll start by saying that I come from a very poor background.